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Mar 3, 2009
It must be over 'cuz I'm singing!!!
Wooooo Hooooooo! Darling Daughter's divorce is F-I-N-A-L with NO visitation! YIPPY SKIPPY and thank you court system for understanding that it is in my grandson's best interest to NOT be subjected to his father's stupidity.
If you had told me five years ago I would be happy to see my daughter divorced, I would not have believed you. I'm not a big believer in divorces and often think they are too easy to obtain and tend to make marriage just one more disposable item in our society.
But THIS divorce keeps my grandson safe. And I am ALL about keeping Mr. B safe.
I was scared to death the judge was going to order county-supervised visits, where my daughter would have to take Mr. B to a county facility one hour a month and let him be fawned over by his father. This is what they normally do in situations where a parent cannot be trusted to keep the child safe while the child is in that parent's care. But daughter's lawyer was good, and the judge listened, and apparently two counts of child endangerment are (more than) enough to keep this guy away from Mr. B. Mr. B is safe. Mr. B is young enough to forget what's happened to him (according to his pediatrician). Mr. B will grow up with excellent male role models in his grandfather and his uncle. Men who know how to treat women and children with respect, who know how to go out and work for a living, who understand why laws are NOT meant to be broken, and who understand that there are consequences to actions.
My daughter and I talked about how to deal with Mr. B's questions about his "daddy". Her idea is to explain that some kids have mommy's and daddy's, some kids have only a mommy, and some kids have only a daddy, but Mr. B is lucky in that he has one person who wants to be both his mommy and his daddy. She's such a good mom.
Mr. B has been asking about his father, because he sees other kids at daycare get picked up by their fathers. A neighbor told him that his father was "on vacation" but since Mr. B remembers the high-speed police chase and the car crash, I didn't like him thinking that ex-SIL (yes! EX-son-in-law!) was being rewarded for his actions, so I explained to him that his dad was NOT on vacation, but was on a "big people time out" because his job was to keep Mr. B safe, and he wasn't able to do that. Mr. B definitely understood "time out".
I'm sure it won't be all smooth sailing from here. EXSIL (Oh yeah, that's going to be his blog name) will be getting out of prison in April, and we may have to deal with him again, despite court orders otherwise -- that's the kind of guy he is, afterall. But it's not time to worry about that yet. It's time to celebrate the court's decision and know we don't have to face traumatic face-to-face meetings in a cold county-ordered facility. And it's time to celebrate that this man cannot put my grandson's life at risk yet again. And it's time to celebrate that my daughter will no longer be verbally and emotionally abused.
Heck, it's just plain time to celebrate!
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